“Collecting my Halloween attire for wearing to Fall Festival, new orange shirt with jack o lanterns & lime green fedora hat!”

Forget the first day of school, what you wear to the Fall Festival is what everyone notices. Gotta set out your outfit the night before. I get it, mom, you don’t want to look scary, but you want to look festive. We all remember the year I helped mom pick out her halloween costume.  

I guarantee you either the shirt or hat or both were purchased last year in that somber post-halloween section of Target. You know… that lost aisle behind the newly vamped christmas tchotchkes. Its where all the Halloween stuff used to be, but at 3pm on Halloween they start stocking wreaths. By November 2nd, that last Halloween aisle looks like a Ross Dress for less only full of spooky skeletons missing their light-up heads or pre-opened make-up kits. That’s when my mom SWOOOPS in and snags the only two good items left: a lime green fedora and a sweet jack o lantern T <—- srsly check out etsy steal. Only $14.95, ya’ll.

In addition to the recent church retreat, the Fall Festival is like my mom’s other Super Bowl sized event. She has like eight.